Thursday, December 3, 2009

First Love..

There comes a time in everybody’s life when the tender young flower comes out of its bud to bloom and finds the earth, the sun, the sky, the dew, the rain, the leaf everything very beautiful. The heart is free to fly and knows not what the world beholds. One wants to fly like a butterfly, be free, carefree, and dancing. One holds on to whatever gives them hand, and by the pure heart, give away that hand, everything it has in return.


We all love once, in our tender age, and that is the time we give our complete trust, our heart and everything to that person. We do not think twice before trusting someone. When we meet that special someone, who shares the same feelings you do, with Goosebumps all over you, with days and nights spent lying on the bed with your face in the pillow thinking about the special someone, hugging your teddy, unexplained smiles on your face early morning which parents find weird, and the mysterious dancing on the extremely hot sunny afternoon.


Yes, this is the magic of love. The world appears to be a wonderful place. The worst of the things appear amusing, fun and beautiful. There is a persistence tingling feeling in your heart and a constant flow of adrenalin. We stretch, and cuddle and move round and round in circles and all that is in your mind is that special someone.
Your restlessness carries u from one room to another, jumping up and down, making everyone in the house wonder what is wrong, apparently making it obvious to some smart mothers about what’s cooking.


"ring ring".. the phone rings.. And you rush to your phone speedily, even overtaking the light and grab it to see that special someone calling. And you smile. And that is, the most wonderful feeling, your heart skips a beat and you lock your room, jump onto the bed and cuddle up to say "hiiiiiii".


You have so much to say, so much to express, but you cannot keep up pace with your thoughts, oh, u also want to hear that special someone speak, want them to tell you the three eternal words, and not once, but again and again.


The most mystifying feeling is when u hear those special words from that special someone. When they say it with their whole heart, a surge of some unknown chemical, acid-like, suddenly fills up your heart, it’s a moment of immense pleasure, and your whole body gets numb, your senses stop working and it takes time to come to your normal self.


And as usual, you decide to meet, and before the meet, you look at yourself a 100 times in the mirror, look at every inch of your dressing, your hair, and yourself from every angle. You run to meet, but take care your hair isn’t spoilt in the process. There is something nasty in your heart that’s beating fast and oh, u see that person over there.. And it feels bliss. It feels like the whole world is in front of you. It feels like you have everything in this world that you need to live for. Slight tingling sensation is felt and a unavoidable blush-cum-smile comes on your face. No matter what you do, you cannot hide that smile.


And you finally meet. There is an awkward silence. And mysterious smiles. Suddenly, the awkwardness is broken and there is sharing of everything on the earth. And there is no limitations of topic. Anything under the sun is debated about. There are flirty punches in the process and some "pulling cheeks" which adds to the already present Goosebumps. Then again, when the time to go home comes, there is another silence. The realization of separation surges over and slowly, while walking, the hand lightly holds another. And at this moment, the hands seem the only living part of the body. The rest of the body is numb. NUMB. Even the breath stops. And the chest becomes heavy. While you are on your way back, your hand is sweaty. Your heart and breath have just started working again and nothing in the world seems real. It seems all a fantasy. Except for that special someone, the world is a blind place. U cannot see anything. No parents, no friends, no trees, no road, nothing. Just love. Pure, innocent love.


It is this feeling which makes you realize that this is the person you would fight the whole world for. This is the only person whom you want in your life, whom you will tell everything about yourself, every little secret. This is the person whom you will always walk with, and will sacrifice everything for the love and happiness of this person.


This love makes you forget your cell phone in the class, forget your books at home, forget your house keys in the garden, keeps the gas on without reason, makes you forget to eat food, forget that exams are coming, makes you forget everything around you.


You come home and hug and kiss anyone who opens the door. You are so excited, and happy and you hum a beautiful love song all day long..

13 comments:

  1. so touched...
    I can totally understand this "first love"...
    reading those words make me remind of that special one who appeared in my life...
    such a beautiful memory and relationship just like u say !!

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  2. My favourite...loved ur writing style in this one...my fav. part :

    "It is this feeling which makes you realize that this is the person you would fight the whole world for. This is the only person whom you want in your life, whom you will tell everything about yourself, every little secret. This is the person whom you will always walk with, and will sacrifice everything for the love and happiness of this person."

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  3. and then comes the quintessential first 'break up'


    and the first suicidal tendancies

    and the first feeling of steel on skin

    **sigh**

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  4. awesum rooj... touchd mah heart!

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  5. @nailedtothecross666 - :-) its a part of life. Enjoy every moment of it.

    @richie - thanks!

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  6. niice!! :)
    that was very nice!

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  7. u write amazing...u reminded me some old wounds... there are certain times in your life that come with little smiles, grow with often skipping of hearth beats, grooms itself without your knowledge, makes you helpless at moments, someday u get the heavy load of happiness u cud carry,the amount of care u would have ever remembered, the amount of love u would have ever been loved.that makes u feel u r the king of this world..and u will do anything to sustain this feeling in u...Then one day the ice starts melting and the glass falls...then you realize its ur heart which is scattered,broken ,ripped of to pieces,smashed...but wat can u do, when u realise oneday its your fault altogether...it was your fault and its very late for u to make the river flowbackk again....Rest of you life becomes a formality...then the bloody god smiles...

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  8. i'm glad people see themselves in my writings. which is the whole aim of my writing. :-)

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  9. really true!!>....loved it toe-talliii!!!!!!....:P....do keep me posted bout ur blogh!....:D

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